Every year I schedule all of our yearly physical’s at around the same time. Liv and I go together, and Denton and Hayden go together. But they are all the same week. That’s one of the tasks that we crossed off of our to-do list this past week.
Since the kids are both 18 now (WHAT!) everyone gets their own private room, that way if there is anything they want to talk about privately, they can. This amuses my children to no end.
Everything was tracking along swimmingly, and our Nurse Practitioner asked how I did with needles. Fine, I said. I used to give blood regularly, I’ve had two kids, etc., etc. Send in the nurse. Who came in, poked at my arm for a few minutes, tied off my upper arm with the stretchy tourniquet and stabbed me with the needle. All this time we are chatting away.
After a few minutes she is frowning down at my arm and hasn’t changed the vial yet, so I casually asked if everything was going according to plan. She frowned some more and said, yes, but it’s taking longer than I would like. And begins to bend the needle. At least that’s what it felt like to me. After another few minutes of bending needles I began to see flashing lights and deep space. She said, Honey are you okay? Never better, I responded. The black, blank space receded and the flashing lights stopped. She slid the needle out and asked me something else and …….
I promptly fainted.
At least she said that I fainted. I was in the middle of a sentence – when – I looked down and this woman I met five minutes ago has my ankle, trying to drag it into the air, for what reason I have no idea. So I asked her, Why are you holding my ankle in the air, and why do my teeth hurt? This whole time she is shouting, Julie!, in between trying to yank my ankle back into the air and pressing her thumb into the bend of my arm.
I thought she was going to cry. I just wanted to know what was actually going on because we were literally just having a casual conversation when she started acting very, very strangely in my opinion. The NP comes into the room and they decide that I have to lie down on the table and someone brings me a Dr. Pepper. Then my nurse informs me that I am getting a GIANT red X in my chart. I said that didn’t sound like a good thing, and she informed me that, NO, it wasn’t. That means that from now on I have to lie down on the table to have my blood drawn, because I AM A FAINTER – according to her.
I still wasn’t believing that it actually happened. Because here is the kicker – I have never fainted in my life. Never, not once. I’ve been knocked out once, very briefly for a few seconds, when I cracked my arm falling off the monkey bars as a child, but I’ve never fainted.
So. Something new to add to the list of things that happen as Tracie gets older. If the person drawing my blood is going to twist and bend the needle around for at least five minutes, I am probably going to hit to the floor. If you need another laugh today at my expense, you should check out the story about the time that I could have gone to jail over my teeth. Obviously, older Tracie can’t handle Novocaine, either. Or maybe I never could.
Here’s what you may have missed this past week:
Quote of the Day: President Ronald Reagan
Quote of the Week: Princess Diana
*Expired* FREE Friday Download from Kroger 11.09.18
What’s for Supper? Weekly Meal Plan 11.05.18
And here are all of the lovely houses I found for us!
I hope you had a great week and didn’t faint at the Doctor’s office! See you tomorrow.
YOWZA! What a memorable doctor’s visit! Sounds like the nurse wasn’t very proficient in drawing blood. sorry you had such a bad experience. It’s bad enough to have to go every year AND pay for the privilege. But, to be marked with a big red X…that’s just an insult to an injury- literally!